nice bipolar disorder

Could it be bipolar disorder?
IM 161 / 2 years and if at times in my lifetime that I've actually gotten some or depressed certain things that are troubling in my life I've also wanted to commit suicide in the past but havent cut myself, and I still wanted to commit suicide but i dont think i will. Then after few weeks or a month or 2 later overcome and be more normal and well again, and although I am a very shy person, quiet, pleasant others tend to also have an unpleasant character with my family, at times, but my actions in my defense of the family as a bad mood as I do most of the time, and that is the path that was also raised, my parents also bipolar … well with everything I've said might have bipolar disorder? AND PLEASE NO ONE TELL ME ASK A THERAPIST CUZ I WONT! And please, be honest also makes UU DO WITH BIPOLAR DISORDER OTHER CRAZY people think? Be honest or do not im BIPL and only sometimes have depression, with some thoughts of suicide might this mean I am mad?
It could be a possibility, since in the history of his family, however, There is also an opportunity that can only be a phase of adolescence is happening. I know you do not want to see a therapist, but are the most accurate diagnosis of a psychological disorder. So, please at least consider it. Suicidal tendencies are nothing to clean. Their situation is very serious and needs help, but do not think that because depression has blinded. If you are diagnosed as bipolar, there is nothing "crazy" about it. In fact, there is something special about the disease. He has been linked with literary and artistic genius like Van Gogh, Tennessee Williams, Anne Sexton, Ezra Pound, and the list is endless. And besides, nobody is "perfectly" sane at all times. Sanity is boring:)